Mom thought of the day

Today I nearly caught my death from a plastic donut. While transitioning between taking the dogs out and starting lunch, I happened to step on the cursed thing. Apparently plastic on a wood floor is the equivalent of wearing socks dipped in bacon grease. Luckily, as usual, I managed to regain my balance and land clumsily on my feet about a yard from my stumbling point. Of course, this mild distraction led me to completely forget it was lunchtime and I spent the next few moments in an infuriating haze in the kitchen, wondering why I was headed for that room in the first place, before my sense returned to me. How you forget you're hungry is beyond me. It then occurred to me how absurd it would have been to have broken my neck slipping on this thing. My obituary would read "Local woman slips on poorly portrayed plastic pastry." This is how you know you need to do something with your life. When this is the most interesting thing to write about.